In the end, it's a day to day thing. Sometimes I feel less guilt, sometimes I feel more. I hope that if I keep TRYING to access wise mind and be self-compassionate that in the long run I'll feel less and less guilty. In the meantime, I acknowledge that it's part of my diagnosis. BPD people tend to be obsessive in their thinking and have trouble letting go of it. I see all those little serotonin guys trying to make the leap from connector to connector in my brain and see that some of them are in a feedback loop. I try to visualize it being fixed. But mostly, on heavily guilt-ridden days, I just have to live with the icky feeling. I might KNOW that it's an inappropriate response, but knowing doesn't always change the feeling.
I'm sorry I don't have a "quicker fix" idea to overcoming feeling guilty. But I've learned in my years of therapy, there are very few silver bullets out there. For the most part, it's a process of:
1. becoming aware of the issue
2. finding the strength and willingness to deal with the issue
3. learning helpful "re-conditioning" skills that work for the particular moment
4. practicing the skills and persevering
5. over a period of time, gradually becoming aware that the issue is diminishing.