DBT Self Help - Interpersonal Cheerleading
Interpersonal Effectiveness

Dialectical Behavioral Therapy‘s Interpersonal Effectiveness skills are designed to help you get what you need from your relationships while being respectful of yourself and others. Interpersonal relationships can be very challenging when you are also dealing with unstable emotions.interpersonal cheerleading statements are statements that people tell themselves to give themselves permission to ask for what they need or want, to say no, and to act effectively. They are true statements meant to increase your Interpersonal Effectiveness.

There are three types of cheerleading statements:

  1. Statements that provide the courage to act effectively
  2. Statements that help you prepare for the situation, get ready to be effective, and focus on what works
  3. Statements that counteract myths about interpersonal behavior.

Cheerleading Statements for Interpersonal Effectiveness

  • It is OK to want or need something from someone else.
  • I have a choice to ask someone for what I want or need.
  • I can stand it if I don’t get what I want or need.
  • The fact that someone says no to my request doesn’t mean I should not have asked in the first place.
  • I can act skillfully and still not get my objective met.
  • Standing up for myself over “small” things can be just as important as “big” things.
  • I can insist on my rights and still be a good person.
  • I sometimes have a right to assert myself, even if I may inconvenience others.
  • The fact that other people might not be assertive doesn’t mean that I shouldn’t be.
  • I can understand and validate another person and still ask for what I want.
  • There is no law that says other people’s opinions are more valid than mine.
  • I may want to please people I care about but I don’t have to please them all the time.
  • Giving, giving, giving, is not the be-all of life. I am an important person in this world too.
  • If I refuse to do a favor for people, that doesn’t mean I don’t like them. They will probably understand that too.
  • I am under no obligation to say yes to people simply because they ask a favor of me.
  • The fact that I say no to someone does not make me a selfish person.
  • If I say no to someone and they get angry, that does not mean that I should have said yes.
  • I can still feel good about myself even if someone else is annoyed with me.

Explore More DBT Skills

a lawn sign says 'you are worthy of love'


Affirmations are a lot like cheerleading statements. They’re designed to bring confidence and validation. Read More>

a kaleidescope of faces


We all carry around untruthful beliefs sometimes. These common interpersonal myths simply aren’t true. Read More>


Additional Resources

Mental Health Resources
We aren't the only mental health resource out there. Check out these books, websites, social media accounts, and more for additional support. Read More
DBT Flashcards

Making DBT skills second nature takes practice. Use these flashcards on their page, download your own to print out, or purchase our pre-made set from our shop. Read More

DBT Encyclopedia

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Mindfulness Exercises

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Diary Cards

Diary cards help track your emotions, urges, behaviors, and skill use. They help you see patterns. Learn how to use them and get samples. Read More